When It's Not Your Time: Kayin, Hevel, and the Wisdom of Waiting
In this week’s Parsha the Torah relates the episode of the karbanos of the first brothers, Kayin and Hevel. While they both brought sacrifices, the posuk tells us that Hashem turned to the offering of Hevel but to the one of Kayin he did not turn. This aroused a jealousy in Kayin, as the posuk says ויחר לקין מאד ויפלו פניו, that it very much annoyed Kayin. It is a misconception to assume that only the outcome of Kayin’s envy, that he killed his brother Hevel, was Kayin’s sin in this entire episode, rather it is the original resentment itself that was also wrong. We find that Hashem rebuked Kayin for his melancholy and annoyance that his brother's sacrifice was accepted, while his was not. It was after Hashem's reproach that Kayin took the life of his brother Hevel.
What was wrong with Kain’s original bitterness and disappointment of not finding favor in the eyes of Hashem? Why was his disenchantment reprimanded? While coveting is a sin, severe enough to make it to the last of the Ten Commandments, that is only when it comes to mundane matters. On the other hand, when someone is envious of another's spiritual accomplishments or achievements, and it inspires them to strive for more, the feeling of wanting what the other has is to be lauded and celebrated and most definitely not criticized.
Some Chasidic commentators offer the following approach. The sacrifice of the brothers can be learned as a metaphor of their individual service of Hashem. Each had his own individual path and unique way of service (Avodas Hashem), and the Karbanos was a challenge to determine whose style of service was preferred. From the initial outcome it would seem that Hevel won and seemingly his version of service was the superior one. However that is not truly the case.
Referring to the non acceptance Kayin sacrifice the Torah uses a very specific and uncommon word, ואל קין ואל מנחתו לא שעה. While Rashi explains the word שעה in this specific context means turned to, homiletically it can also be understood using a more standard definition of the word, meaning hour or time. The Torah is giving us a deeper glimpse into this entire story and where Kayin went wrong and didn’t understand. Hashem had nothing against Kayin, his sacrifice, or his path of service, rather it simply wasn’t his time. Perhaps another time, day, or place the outcomes of whose style of service Hashem preferred would have been different. Kayin couldn't comprehend there are multiple paths in the service of Hashem and that one is not superior. Some may be more relevant for certain situations than others, but all can be considered equal.
This idea is taught in Pirkei Avos (4:3). Do not despise any person, and do not discriminate against anything, for there is no person that has not their hour, and there is no thing that has not its place. This is what Kayin didn’t understand, this was Hevel’s time for greatness and having his achievements recognized, but Kayin would have his chance at some point. On the contrary to Kayin’s approach, in Parshas Vayechi (Gen 47:31) we find Yaakov Aveinu bowing to Yosef, understanding it was Yosef’s moment in time. Rashi on that Pasuk quotes the Gemara in Migilah explaining, Rabbi Binyamin bar Yefes said that Rabbi Elazar said: This explains what people say: When the fox is in its hour, bow down to it, (i.e., if a fox is appointed king and not the usual king of the animals- the lion), one must bow down before and submit oneself to it.
Appreciating this novel understanding of Kayin's original sin can be translated into our daily lives. For instance, many of us chose a competitive field to study and work within and at times we may become envious of the personal, academic, or career achievements of others. We may feel we studied or worked harder than them and we are more deserving for some of the promotions they attained. It is important to recognize our achievements, success, and positive experiences in the past and recognize that there are good things that lay in our future. Everyone has their time and place and no one can take from someone else. As Bez Azai teaches in Meschtas Yoma (38a-b), “By your name they shall call you, and in your place, they shall seat you, and from your own they shall give you. As no person may touch that which is prepared for another by Hashem; And one reign does not overlap with another and deduct from the time allotted it even a hairbreadth.”
1. ואל קין ואל מנחתו לא שעה (בראשית פרק ד' פסוק ה')
2. שם פסוק ו'
3. שם
4. קנאת סופרים תרבה חכמה (מסכת בבא בתרא, דף כ"ב, עמוד א')
5. הוא היה אומר, אל תהי בז לכל אדם, ואל תהי מפליג לכל דבר, שאין לך אדם שאין לו שעה ואין לך דבר שאין לו מקום. (משנה אבות ד ג)
6. וישתחו ישראל על ראש המטה (בראשית פרק מז' פסוק לא')
7. תעלא בעדניה סגיד ליה (מגילה טז , ב). פירוש בעת שהשעה עומדת לו – סגיד ליה, כמו 'אין לך אדם שאין לו שעה' (אבות פ"ד, מ"ג), לפיכך קאמר 'תעלא בעדניה סגיד ליה' ,דהא אביו היה, ונחשב הבן אצלו 'תעלא', אפילו הכי היה משתחוה לו. (גור אריה על בראשית מ״ז:ל״א)
8. מִכָּאן אָמַר בֶּן עַזַּאי: בְּשִׁמְךָ יִקְרָאוּךְ, וּבִמְקוֹמְךָ יוֹשִׁיבוּךְ, וּמִשֶּׁלְּךָ יִתְּנוּ לְךָ. אֵין אָדָם נוֹגֵעַ בַּמּוּכָן לַחֲבֵירוֹ. וְאֵין מַלְכוּת נוֹגַעַת בַּחֲבֶרְתָּהּ אֲפִילּוּ כִּמְלֹא נִימָא.