Korach: חכמות נשים בנתה ביתה
Liluei Nishmas Ita bas Chanoch Aharon Bistritzky
This week’s Torah portion discusses Korach’s insurrection against Moshe Rabeinu’s leadership. Chazal in Sanhedrin 108A points out that due to the grave sins of Korach and his faction, they were not only punished in this world but are eternally condemned in the afterlife as well.
In the first sentence of the Parsha, the Torah tells us of those who assisted Korach in his quest for leadership, specifically the brothers Dassan and Aviram, together with their fellow tribesman On Ben Peles. However, when the Torah describes the debates and confrontations with the insurgents, it states that Moshe went and told the Bnei Yisroel to “withdraw from the dwelling of Korah, Dassan, and Aviram” and there is no mention of On. Likewise, his name is not included on the list of people punished for being part of the camp of Korach. If he was from the movement’s founding leaders, where did he go? Rashi, quoting the Gemara of Sanhedrin 110A, states that “the wife of On saved him.” The Gemara goes on to explain how On’s wife pointed out the fallacies of his position and cleverly devised a plan for him to be able to disassociate from his fellow anarchists, which ultimately led to him being spared eternal punishment.
Whereas On’s wife was his agent of salvation, it was Korach’s wife who placed him on a path that consequently led to his undoing. The Midrash relates that it was Korach’s wife who instigated him to rebel against Moshe, and it was she who authored the movement’s arguments and complaints. Regarding these two spouses, the Gemorah refers to the posuk in Mishlei (14:1) that חכמות נשים בנתה ביתה ואולת בידיה תהרסנו, every wise woman builds her house, but the foolish one tears it down with her own hands. The verse refers to the wives of On and Korach, respectively.
In Parshas Bereishis (1:18), when Hashem describes the plan that each person should have a mate, the Posuk says לא־טוב היות האדם לבדו אעשה־לו עזר כנגדו, I shall make him a helpmate opposite him. Rashi on that Posuk quotes the Gemara Yevamos 63A that if one is worthy, the spouse will be a helpmate, and if one is not worthy, the spouse will be against them and even act as an opposition.
The spouses of Korach and On are noteworthy examples of how a spouse can either assist or oppose one’s spiritual growth. When one is looking for a spouse, it is important to be aware of the potential dichotomy of what a partner's role is in one's spiritual life and to choose wisely with whom to build a home. Likewise, once someone is married, they should never mitigate the importance of their partner’s role in their pursuit of excellence in Torah and mitzvos.